God what *is* this place?? It's so *grey*, and filthy - gum and litter everywhere. And motorways - lanes of traffic all packed together and going 5mph (I'm back on miles again - I still don't know how fast 100kph is, I just know it was the speed limit on the aussie highways so 120kph was ok too). And when the hell is the sun going to come out? It's 8am and the sun should be blazing down by now. It's doubly upsetting because my body is assuming its late afternoon and this grim grey sky isn't doing anything to help reset my rhythms. And my place is a mess (at least compared to the neatly laundered hotel rooms I've been flitting to and from). In short - *wah* boo hoo sniff sob. I've made a terrible mistake. At least before this trip I could tolerate the mundanity of my existence because I knew no better - but now I do *waaah* <cracks open a tinnie - hell it's a perfectly acceptable time to start drinking in Queensland>

A fair amount of musical chairs happened on the Singapore to Manchester flight. I started out jammed next to an oldish plummy couple, but they only sat down for a short while then buggered off to some free seats elsewhere, perhaps cos I smell. Then after take off a lady flying from Auckland sat down on the opposite side of the three to me and said she'd just flown non-stop from Auckland and was sick with sleep deprivation, did I mind if she came and splayed out in the seats next to me? She was pleasant and had an interesting take on Queensland, kinda familiar but not, and kept hinting the New Zealand was an even bigger backwater than hinterland Oz (makes me shudder to think about it). She was going to a funeral and faced having to drive from Manchester to Brighton when she landed. Given all that, I figured she deserved a nap and I promised to stop anyone waking her for food, she didn't care about meals anymore.

Of course I thought it would be a happy relationship until she bedded down and it rapidly became apparent she was going to have her head practically in my lap the entire time and fidgit around a lot. As I desperately needed sleep too this wasn't what I needed so finally I moved seats as well, to the end of a three-er with a nice quiet Singaporian bloke who was clearly going to leave me alone the entire trip, and not invade my space. I told the kiwi woman I was doing it for her behalf to give her the full three chairs to sleep on, but I was lying through my teeth and really just ensuring my own sleep time. Either way I got away with it, and spent most of the trip having fevered dreams about turbulence, interdispered with ocassional bouts of wakefulness where I watched 'Crash' (disturbing film - v.good) and Kath and Kim. Immigation finally worked for me not against me at least cos I got to go through the EU fast channel, though the baggage handling was painfully slow. And then a quick whizz home in a taxi, just skimming rush hour, and here am I now at home, very dazed and confused.

Peace though. Stillness. Just the gentle creaks of my central heating (because I'm obviously freezing cold). And the ability to unpack my bag and not have to pack it again the next day...though I sort of don't want to unpack it yet because it'll break the spell.

I'm clearly feeling a bit emotional at the moment. I feel a bit like that Replicant at the end of Bladerunner. "I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. Bioluminescent algae on the Great Barrier reef and Platypus gambling in the Eungella forests. All those moments will be lost in time like tears in rain. Time ... to die". It's sad to think it's all over now and will only survive in my poor pickled braincells until the next particularly intense Stella bender...Don't worry, I'm not going to top myself though. I might be a bit glum for a while of course and it's going to take a big effort to stay cheerful today. I think I'll have to go into town or something to keep my mind of stuff.

But on the plus side - What a holiday!! I look back on some of the stuff I managed to do and just grin. No regrets (even the dud bits were fascinating and make good tales), bloody glad I did it and I reckon doing this has opened up a whole new array of possibities for me. I also reckon that if anyone else out there has a dream to see a place and do something, they should blummin' well go out and do it and stop prevaricating!

Now I guess all I should do is simply get back into reality, knuckle under, and get saving for the next grand adventure. And the next. And the next.

This is ejk's oz adventure - tired, chilly, but triumphant - signing off.

*blip*